Buried Memories
by Dr. Christie
Summary: One-shot set right after The Doctor's Wife. Amy is searching for her and Rory's new bedroom after House deleted their old one, but stumbles upon an old room left untouched. A room with a Rose carved on the handle. K  for Amy being Amy at the beginning.


Amy is searching for her and Rory's new bedroom after House deleted their old one, but stumbles upon an old room left untouched. A room with a Rose carved on the handle.

It's just K+ for Amy being Amy at the beginning.

Alright, so this was another idea I had. If any people reading Loving the Impossible read this, then explanation- I'm having really bad writers block on the next chapter and I'm trying to get around it, but for the meantime I'm just writing down these ideas.

So this is sorta because Moffat seems to not want to mention anything before series 5, other than River and a few enemies. And I've read a few 'Amy finds Rose's old room' and had this idea. I don't know if it's a lot like the others… but anyways. Here it is.

I do not own Doctor Who : (

And this is set right after The Doctor's Wife, there aren't super mind bending spoilers but there're just a couple small ones for mainly the 6th season.

**Buried Memories**

Amy walked down the hall, searching for their new bedroom, praying the Doctor had acquiesced Rory's request.

"Amy?" Rory had lost sight of her apparently. She stopped, she hated the feeling just as much as him after the hours spent in House's torment.

"Come on, stupid face," She said, using her favorite nickname. "Where were you?"

"Asking for more specific directions," Rory said, turning the corner, "It's on the right, ten doors down."

She already counted three doors.

When Rory had caught up, Amy grabbed him by his vest and pushed him against the hallway's wall, kissing him running her hands through his short hair.

She had to say, it was a very good kiss, even by her standards, so she was surprised when she felt him pushing her away lightly.

"Rory?" Amy asked, she'd thought he would have wanted this, after the stranger-than-usual day they had been through.

"Sorry," He said, starting to look around awkwardly.

"You don't want…?" She was confused, this wasn't like him.

"Um, no," At her face he added, "Well, yeah, I do, but… um, I just remembered something."

"What?"

"Ohh, nothing, it's just… When the Doctor and then House deleted the rooms I forgot about it, but I just remembered," Rory said, not looking her in the eye, he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Rory, what's this thing you're so worried about?" Amy asked, she was starting to worry herself.

"Well, it's nothing really," Rory tried to change the topic, "How 'bout you go to our room, and I'll catch up, I mean, I had a question for the Doctor and-"

"Rory I'm your wife, stop lying," Amy cut in. She'd always had a knack for knowing when Rory was lying or telling the truth, it didn't fail her now.

"Right, sorry," Rory said, trying to move away from the wall, blocked by Amy's arms on either side of his shoulders.

"So, Rory," Amy leaned forward, "What is this precious thing that is sooo important it can interrupt… this?"

"Um, well," Rory was getting even more awkward and embarrassed by the second.

"Rory. Explain. Now," Amy ordered. And like the obedient husband Rory was, he complied in his own way.

"Well, you remember when we were… younger?" Rory asked, starting to blush.

"Yeah, course I do," Amy said, not understanding where this was going.

"You remember how you wanted us to keep di-journals?" Rory asked.

Amy thought she knew where this was going now, but she didn't understand what it had to do with now. She wanted Rory to get to the point quickly, her arms were getting tired.

"Yeah," Amy said, "I've still got mine, in my room at home."

"Yeah, well, when we first started travelling with the Doctor," Rory was now a deep shade of red and it kept getting darker, Amy started to wonder if your head could explode from so much blushing. "I thought, since we were going to get married, and we might think about having kids…" He stopped for a second.

"What's this got to do with kids?" Amy asked quietly. At the mention of kids, it brought the memory of America and the false alarm to mind.

"Well I thought, maybe, if we _did _have kids… well, they might like the stories… of the things we did, where we went… and all," Rory said. "So I wrote about what we did… in my journal."

"Oh Rory, you are so sweet," Amy smiled.

"I was going to surprise you, if we ever did think seriously about having a kid," Rory said.

"Well, I think it's a lovely idea," Amy replied, "But this still doesn't explain what it has to do with you going off."

"Well, before House, I was writing in it, in the library," Rory said, "And I left it there, but the library was deleted."

"But the Doctor brought it back," Amy said.

"Yeah, so I was going to go and get.. it," Rory said.

"Can't it wait?" Amy asked, slightly annoyed now that she had found the source of the interruption to be Rory's diary.

"Um well, no," Rory said blushing.

Amy suddenly understood. With a small smirk she asked, "You don't want the Doctor finding it, do you?"

"Well no," Rory said, "I mean, 'cause it's sort of our… family… thing."

"It's because it's your diary," Amy said, ignoring his explanation for hers, which was probably closer to the truth than his.

"Journal!" Rory defended his pride, "And well yeah," He admitted when Amy rolled her eyes, "I just don't really want him having that to use against me."

"How would he use it against you?" Amy asked with a laugh, Rory seemed a little paranoid.

"Have you seen how much he insults me? And teases me?" Rory said, seeming surprised she hadn't, "I'm not deaf or blind, he's always making fun of my… nose." He finished.

"Well, I think it's a lovely nose," Amy said, tapping his nose, trying to comfort her husband, "Alright, fine. Go get your diary," She smiled at Rory about to protest but she continued, "And I'll meet you in our room."

"Right," Rory moved away from the wall as Amy brought her arms to her side, "Thanks." He kissed her lightly and ran off down the hall, looking for the library.

Amy watched him jog away before turning.

"Right, now to find our room," She marched off, counting doors.

* * *

><p>"On the right… ten doors down…" Amy said to herself as she searched for her room, walking slowly as she counted the doors.<p>

"Eight, nine… ah, ten," She stopped when she got to the tenth door, "Here it is, let's see what he made us."

She had come to a dark wooden door, the handle had a carving of a rose on it. She counted the doors again, this must be it.

She opened the door and walked in, only to stop suddenly. She had walked into a small bedroom with a double bed with a large dark pink comforter thrown over it quickly as though the occupant had hurriedly thrown it, rushing to go somewhere. The walls were a light pink, but a shade that didn't clash with the comforter or a small chair in the corner. There was a large white dresser in the corner, a couple of the drawers left open showing that they were packed with clothes. Obviously a young woman's clothing.

At first Amy thought it was the Doctor being the Doctor, then she realized this wasn't their room. It was someone else's.

She went out into the hall and counted the doors again. Ten. This was the right room. She went back inside, not one to ignore a mystery.

She looked around once more, this time noticing a large stack of newspapers in the corner nearest to her.

She pulled one out at random, it was stapled to second one, dated the day after the first. They both had the same picture- what seemed like a large ship, it reminded Amy of a bug except with airplane wings- though the headlines were different. The first one stated- ALIENS CRASH IN THE THAMES- BIG BEN DESTROYED. The second announced- ALIEN HOAX?

Amy smiled, she guessed it had to do with some adventure the Doctor had gotten into.

She looked through the newspapers, paying specific attention to the articles that were circled in red ink. The newspapers ranged from the 1920's to 3728577, though the most common were from 2005 and 2006. She saw one from 2012- OLYMPIC TORCH ARRIVES IN LONDON.

After she had gotten through the old(and some not even printed yet) newspapers, Amy put them neatly back where she had found them. As she did, her elbow knocked one she hadn't noticed from the small table holding a lamp. The newspaper slid to the floor and Amy read the headline- BATTLE OF CANARY WHARF LEAVES HUNDREDS DEAD- EVEN MORE MISSING. Instead of a picture, there was a large block dedicated to a long list of names. In the first lines of the article it stated that a continued list of the dead and missing could be found on the next page. She read through the names of the dead quickly, noting that two of the names had been crossed out, towards the end of the T's. Turning the page she found the end of the list of those found dead and the beginning of those missing. The list was even longer, with a note at the end informing all readers of a number to call if information of those missing was found.

After the number was a small, handwritten title.

_PARALLEL WORLD:_

_Jackie Tyler_

_Rose Tyler_

Beneath the second name, there was a third scribbled in, the handwriting familiar. The Doctor's

_Meta-Crisis Doctor  
><em>

She didn't know what to make of the third... name? She got the Doctor part, but meta-crisis? The Doctor would have some questions to answer, if she decided to tell him about how she had found this room._  
><em>

"Parallel world?" Amy said to herself, looking at the label for the handwritten section. She almost laughed when she realized she had been whispering, but stopped herself, it didn't feel right, being too loud in this strange, lost room. _Knowing the Doctor, he's probably been to a few._

She stood, putting the last newspaper on the table once more and looked around, still curious.

She moved around the bed, aiming for the dresser, there were what seemed to be pictures lying face up there, but she tripped before she had moved more than halfway across the room. She bent down to get a better look at what had caused her to trip.

It was a large white binder. After opening it, Amy found it was filled with pictures.

She opened it to a random page. The first picture to catch her eye was slightly tilted and the couple Amy guessed were the focus of the picture were a bit off-center, as though the person taking the picture wasn't too familiar with cameras. It showed a young blond woman, only a little younger than Amy, standing next to a tall man. He had bright blue eyes, a short hair cut, and was wearing a dark leather jacket. The couple seemed to be laughing at the person behind the camera.

Amy wondered who they were, old companions of the Doctor? Was he the one behind the camera?

She flipped to another page. The tall man was gone, replaced by a taller man. Amy noted that he was very handsome, perfectly combed dark hair and good muscles and a bright smile. He was wearing tight jeans a t-shirt. He and the blond girl were standing in front of a large fountain, one that looked familiar to Amy. It took a minute before she remembered where she had seen it- a postcard from her friend who had been visiting Paris.

She rolled her eyes, if the people shown in the pictures were old companions of the Doctor then they must have been lucky. Whenever he tried to take Amy and Rory to someplace like Paris in the twentieth they usually ended up in some bog in Ireland in the first century, or in the middle of a palace of some Chinese emperor, just to be thrown in jail.

She turned to another page. This picture had a similar qualities to the first one, slightly tilted, the couple(the first man, with the leather jacket, was back) was a bit off center. This time, they were standing in front of a large building that seemed to have all the piping on the outside. Amy recognized this as the museum of modern art. She could see the person taking the picture in a reflection in one of the windows. It was the handsome man, this time wearing a long coat, something similar to those from the second World War, if Amy was correct. Her history was getting better with all the travelling with the Doctor.

She flipped to the front of the album, wanting to start from the beginning, completely forgetting about why she had come here in the first place. Rory could find her.

The first picture was of the young blond woman. She had long hair and was wearing a heavy jacket. Amy could tell it was cold by the background of the picture- a frozen lake with snow-capped mountains in the background. Amy would've believed it had been taken on Earth, up north in the winter, except for the fact that the frozen lake seemed to glow a light aqua, lighting up the whole clearing that the girl was in. The trees seemed to be made completely of ice, they were see-through, with the same aqua tint as the lake. The girl was grinning happily, snow in her hair, her cheeks red from the cold.

Amy kept moving through the album. The first dozen pages were pictures of the girl or landscapes. A couple had the first man in them, but those were rare. After a while, the second man started appearing in the pictures, making a more regular appearance than the first man.

Then the two men disappeared. The blond girls hair had been cut to around her shoulders, and her clothing had gone from what Amy would have labeled a more teen fashion to a more adult choice of clothing. In these newer pictures instead of the leather jacket wearing man or the tall handsome one, there was now a tall man with a kind smile and messy brown hair wearing a long light brown overcoat. He and the girl were constantly holding hands in the pictures and always seemed to be laughing.

Just as the earlier pictures, the backgrounds would change from what seemed to be ice planets to places similar to an average street in London, minus the odd alien with varying degrees of skin colors ranging from light green to a deep maroon.

She wondered who these people were, and if they were friends of the Doctor, where was he?

After a few pages, she saw a picture that the tall brown haired man was missing from. In his place was a shorter, younger looking man, with dark skin a deep brown eyes. He and the girl held hands, but Amy could tell there seemed to be something going on between them, the way they sat next to each other on a bench overlooking a huge canyon with bright purple walls, his arm thrown over her shoulder, it seemed slightly forced.

In the next picture, the brown haired man was back, along with the new man. They were sitting on either side of the blond girl. Amy recognized the top the girl was wearing, it was hanging out of the drawer right in front of Amy's face. She was starting to wonder if the room she was in was the blond girl's.

The brown haired man and the girl seemed to be comfortable sitting the way they were, holding hands, sitting closer than most people would. The other man seemed to be just awkwardly there. Amy started to think it had something to do with the brown haired man.

A few pages more and the second man disappeared.

It was just the man in the long overcoat and the blond girl, shown on different planets, in different times.

Then the pictures stopped. There weren't any more. Amy put the album down and stood, this time making her way more carefully to the dresser.

There were six pictures on the dresser. The first one showed the girl standing by herself in front of the Eiffel Tower. Amy flipped it over, realizing there was writing there.

_Paris, 2153. The Doctor took the picture, he refused to be in it._

So the girl _was_ a friend of the Doctor's. Amy moved to the next picture. It was of the girl with her arm around an older woman, similar enough to the girl to be a relative, probably her mother. They were standing in a small flat together. There was more writing on the back.

_February, month after Slitheen. Mum and me. The Doctor wouldn't be in it- said he was afraid of getting slapped._

So she had been right, the older woman was the mother. The next picture had the three missing men. In the middle was the tall handsome man with the World War Two coat, on his right was the man in the leather jacket, and on his left was the younger man with dark skin.

The back said.

_Cardiff, right before Margaret. The Doctor, Jack, and Mickey. Hope Mickey forgave me._

Amy was starting to pick up that the notes on the back were similar to diary entries, for a second she felt like she was intruding, but then her curiosity got the better of her. She flipped the picture back over.

She didn't see the Doctor. Looking at the writing on the back again she wondered if the writer meant the man in the leather jacket.

She put the picture down and went to the next one. The tall, brown haired man was back, standing with the girl in front of a block of apartments, holding each other's hand. Amy noticed with a jolt the object a few feet to their right. The TARDIS. She looked at the back of the picture.

_Christmas- after the Sycorax. The day after his regeneration. Me and the New New Doctor. Mum took the picture. Still don't know what to think of the new him. More talkative, funnier, better looking, but not MY Doctor._

His regeneration. Amy had forgotten he could do that. She looked at the older picture, with the three men. So maybe the one in the leather jacket _was_ the Doctor. It was strange seeing him like that. She guessed it was from his past, but he looked older than the one she knew.

The next picture showed the girl and the man Amy guessed to be a younger Doctor standing in front of the Eiffel Tower, well that's what she thought at first, until she realized it was a light gold and in the background she could see the London Eye and the Statue of Liberty.

_Space Vegas- 6028. Mickey took the picture. Rose and me. A week before the Cybermen, two months before Canary Wharf._

The writing was in a different hand writing, and it was shaky. So the girl's name was Rose. That would explain the rose carving on the door's handle. Then she remembered the newspaper, Canary Wharf, probably the same Canary Wharf named on the photograph she was holding, the list of the dead- Parallel World- Rose Tyler, she wondered if it was the same Rose. Since it had been handwritten on a newspaper found in the TARDIS, she hazarded a guess that it was. It made her wonder what had happened.

The next picture was of the girl all by herself, sitting in a large circular room. In the center was a large circular console. There was a ramp leading to double doors, double doors that looked remarkably like the ones in the TARDIS. There were huge columns that reminded Amy of coral and the lighting was darker, with a tiny greenish tint. The floor was grating.

Rose was lying of the floor, pictures lying around her, it seemed she was putting them into the album Amy had just left. It looked as though the person taking the picture had surprised her. Rose was pushing a stray blond hair out of her face while grinning and seemed to be mid-speech.

On the back was a longer message, written in the same handwriting as the previous picture.

_The day before Canary Wharf. Rose in the TARDIS console room._

There was a small gap between the lines and the next bit was written in very familiar handwriting.

_I found this in the library, I've decided to put all this in her room, I can't bear to remember it. It's best this way, I just can't bring myself to throw all this out. Rose is fine and happy, so are the others, I would just make it worse. It's better this way._

The Doctor had written this one, the last bit at least, possibly both parts, she wasn't sure. The handwriting was hard to read, it was shaky and it seemed to have been written quickly. It seemed as though it was the Doctor trying to convince himself this was the right choice.

Amy took another look around the room. She couldn't be sure, but she guessed it nothing had been touched or moved since Rose had last left the room. There was even some old clothing thrown in a pile in the clothing, obviously meant to be washed sometime later. It was like walking into the middle of someone's life.

Amy wondered why she was in this room, she was positive she'd gotten the directions right, unless the Doctor had given her the wrong one. Amy stood, taking the last picture of Rose and slipping it into her boot carefully. She walked out into the hall and headed for the Control Room.

* * *

><p>"Doctor?" Amy asked as she walked into the large room, so different from the picture of Rose.<p>

"Amy!" He jumped up from behind the console, where he had probably been tinkering with some circuit. "What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing, I was just wondering-"

"Where your room was?" The Doctor cut her off, thinking he knew what she was going to ask, "Like I told Rory, down the hallway, ten doors on you right."

_So they were the right directions._ Amy thought. Then she had another idea. Maybe the TARDIS had wanted her to see the room. "Yeah, about that," She walked around the console until she was standing right in front of him, she bent down and reached into her boot.

"What's your boot got to do with your room?" The Doctor asked, curious.

"This," Amy pulled out the picture and handed it to the Doctor.

He froze when he saw it. After a few seconds that felt like hours, he finally spoke, "Where did you find that?"

"In Rose's room," Amy said, "The TARDIS showed it to me."

"Why?" The Doctor seemed to address the time machine more than Amy. It seemed to take a while for him to realize he wouldn't be getting an answer, he had gotten used to being able to speak to his ship quite fast.

Instead, Amy answered for her, "Because of what I found, Doctor." She flipped the picture over.

He saw the writing and grabbed the photo, "Amy, you should know it's rude to look through other people's things," He was trying to change the subject, she could tell.

"Yes, like you don't do that," Amy rolled her eyes, "What, you think I didn't notice? When you were in my house, after the Byzantium, you kept looking around, through my stuff."

"That was for a reason," The Doctor defended, slipping the photo into the inner pocket of his jacket, "I thought it was odd that you seemed to have a few things most young women wouldn't. It was because of the reason I brought you with me. Your life didn't make sense, I've explained this already."

"Yes, you have," Amy responded quickly, as though knowing he was going to say that, "And I also had a reason. You're trying to forget them, aren't you? Rose, and Jack, and Mickey."

"Yes," The Doctor said, not even trying to switch the subject this time.

"Did you have any other people? Travelling with you, I mean," Amy asked.

"Yes."

"And did you try and forget them?"

"After my last regeneration, yes."

"Why?" Amy asked.

"Because," The Doctor looked away, "The memories hurt."

"Yes, they do," Amy agreed.

"Right, now that we've agreed on this, can I go back to my work and you to bed?" The Doctor asked.

"No," Amy said.

"Why not?" The Doctor asked, almost in a whine.

"Because you can't bury these memories," Amy said, "The TARDIS showed me her room because of that. You need to stop trying to forget."

The Doctor looked her in the eyes, she almost flinched at the lost look in his, "But it hurts to remember, knowing that they can never come back, knowing what I did to them."

"Doctor," Amy took his hand in hers, "Knowing you, you probably didn't do anything, they probably _chose_."

"You don't even know what happened to them and still you believe they did it willingly," The Doctor nearly whispered.

"Yes, because that's what I would do," Amy said truthfully. Then she had an idea, "Tell me about one of them. Anything. How you met them, a place you took them, why they left. Anything."

"No, Amy, I chose to try and forget them, I don't want to remember it, it hurts too much," The Doctor said, he almost sounded like he was lost, just repeating himself over and over.

"Yes, it hurts, but Doctor," Amy took his other hand, "Remember before the Pandorica? Remember how Rory…" She choked on the word, "Remember how he died? I didn't want to forget him, but I did, I was forced to. But after that, I always felt like I was missing something. But when I did remember, it felt so good. Even though it meant remembering why he was gone, I still had all those good memories, and I wouldn't have missed them for the world."

"Amy…" The Doctor was about to complain but Amy cut him off.

"The TARDIS showed me that room so I could tell you that," She said, "I've seen how sad you can be, when you think no one's looking." When he started to protest again she still went on, "Yeah, I know, I didn't have a choice and I forgot it completely, but you try and bury those memories, and you know you're doing it. You're just making it worse. Look I'm trying to help, I hate seeing you like that and not knowing what to do."

The Doctor looked at the console and started fiddling with some of the switches.

Amy sighed, "Look, just try it, at least once. Please. You don't have to say anything to Rory, but just tell me about anything that happened, before you met us. If it doesn't help I won't ask again."

The Doctor looked back at her. He opened his mouth as if about to speak. Amy waited patiently.

"How about Rose?" Amy tried to help him, "How did you meet her?"

The Doctor took a deep breath. Amy didn't dare to move, scared it might stop him.

He was about to say something when they were interrupted.

"Amy? Where'd you go?" Rory wandered in, "Doctor, have you seen Amy? I went to our room, but she wasn't- Amy!" He spotted her and quickly came down the steps, oblivious to her glare and the way the Doctor dodged around Amy and went in the direction Rory had come from, "Where were you?"

Amy frowned trying to decide whether to tell Rory or not. She decided against it, it was private, something the TARDIS had asked her for help with(in her own way), "I got the directions mixed up, and came back here for some help," She lied easily. Unlike her, Rory couldn't always tell when he spouse was lying.

"Right, well I found it," Rory said, oblivious to the lie, "No bunk beds this time," he said with a smile.

Amy forced one onto her face, "Great, you get your _diary_?" She tried to tease him, like she normally would. She didn't want Rory to know she was worried.

"Um, yeah, I did," He said, taking her hand, "It's in our room, safe from him."

He led her down the hallway that passed the library. At her questioning glance, he explained, "It's a shorter walk to go this way, the room moved a bit."

Amy nodded, glancing into the library as they passed. She stopped, causing Rory to jerk slightly when he felt resistance. He turned and was about to ask her why she had stopped but she shook her head.

The Doctor was sitting on the couch, looking at the photo Amy had found, he seemed to be thinking deeply. He looked up, straight at Amy.

She didn't know how he would react to her watching him, but she stayed where she was, Rory still looking confused.

The Doctor sighed and stood. He walked over to the door and out into the hall. Amy thought he would walk right past by them but he stopped in front of her.

"I thought about what you said," he told her, "She said something like that once," he held the hand holding the photo up slightly, "I'll try."

Amy smiled slightly, "Thanks." Then she glanced at Rory, "Are you fine with him being here?"

"Yeah," The Doctor nodded and walked back into the library.

Amy followed him, this time leading Rory.

"Um, sorry, but what's going on?" Rory asked.

"I'm helping the Doctor," Amy said.

"Why? What's his problem?" Rory asked, still very much confused.

"I'm helping him remember," Amy smiled and took a seat on one of the couches in the large library, it was exactly the same as before the incident with House and the TARDIS. She motioned for Rory to sit beside, which he did quickly.

"So," Rory said, the Doctor was still standing, holding the photo. Rory could see part of it, "Who's she?"

"Rory," Amy admonished him.

"What?" Rory said, "No one was talking and I've a thought that I'm the only one here that has no idea what's going on."

"Well, that's because I didn't think the Doctor would want you to know," Amy said, "I only just found out."

"About what?" Rory asked. This wasn't helping.

"Rose," The Doctor said.

"What?" Rory asked, not understanding the interruption.

"Her name was Rose," The Doctor began, taking a seat on the couch facing Rory and Amy's. "She was a friend of mine, we used to travel together, during my last two regenerations…"

From that day onwards, the Doctor would meet the Ponds in the library, just before they would go to sleep, and tell them a story. Any story.

He would tell them of Susan and Sarah-Jane, of Rose and Jack, or Martha and Donna. He would tell them about the future, and the past. He would tell them about the days he regretted, and those that he wished could have gone on forever.

He had been wrong, to think that burying the memories would lessen the pain. It just made it worse. But telling Amy and Rory, it helped. He finally had what he had never had. Friends who would listen, who would understand, friends to share everything with. Talking to Rose, it had never been like this, it had been good, he had loved talking to her, but this was good, in a different way. He had always wanted to keep her safe, always wanted to make her feel loved. He didn't tell her about his past in fear that it would hurt her.

But he told the Ponds, and it felt good.

He had been wrong.

But now, this felt right.

**Please Review! Constructive criticism is always appreciated along with O MY GOD THIS IS GODLY... well okay, who doesn't like the second more, but seriously, I appreciate all comments especially those that point out mistakes or tips in further writing. Also, sorry if there are any grammar/spelling mistakes, not my strong suit. So please, REVIEW!**


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